Accept Compliments

November 16, 2008

Natasha’s Tip for Today:  Accept compliments when they are given.  For a trial run, look in the mirror and pay yourself two compliments.  This will help you see yourself as others see you.  No snark!

This is particularly hard for me, because I tend to be overly critical of myself.  Enough so that I don’t even look in the mirror unless I’m “getting ready”.  Yes, I’m one of those people who could spend 5 minutes washing hands in front of a mirror and still walk away with a booger hanging out of my nose.

I’m also really bad at simply saying “thank you” when someone pays me a  compliment.  Recently, someone commented on my “amazing complexion” and I proceeded to fill her in on my long battle with adult acne.  Gracious?  Not so much.

I gave myself a good once-over in the full length mirror and tried to see myself through rose-colored glasses.  I looked myself in the eye and told the woman in the mirror that she has nice shoulders and a great smile. 

Throughout the day, I made a point of looking at myself in mirrors as I passed them, and reminding myself of the compliments I gave and subsequently received. 

It was difficult at first, but by the end of the day, I was actually beginning to like that compliment-giving woman in the mirror.  I think I might invite her over more often because thanks to her I was feeling pretty good about myself.

The verdict?  A very effective tip, especially for those of us who tend to be negative about our appearance.  After a while, I noticed other things about myself that are pretty nice, too.  Not only that, but it was great to look at myself with softer, more forgiving eyes, and get a glimpse of what my husband sees when he looks at me.

Ease of use:  Emotionally difficult, but not too bad once I just DID it.

Minute count: About 10 minutes in the morning, and 30 second glimpses in the mirror throughout the day.

Dollar count: $0.  It might have even saved me from some future therapy bills, ha ha.

Over all rating:  A great tip – one I would recommend for anyone who needs a mood booster.  Who doesn’t love to hear something wonderful about themselves, especially when the compliment is sincere?


Get Off Your Duff

November 8, 2008

Natasha’s Tip for Today: Get your lazy ass up and exercise.  Exercise releases endorphins and you’ll feel great knowing you’ve done your body some good.  If you stick with it, the results will be an awesome boost to your self esteem!

Sorry for my long absence.  My desire to bring sexy back took a little vacation, thanks to hormones and the changing of the season from Summer straight on through to Winter.  Whine, whine, whine.  At least I’m back now and finally tackling today’s tip. 

Believe me when I say I prefer a big bowl of ice cream topped with M&M’s over exercising.  I used to be so disciplined about nutrition and working out, but over the past year I’ve become less so.  Where less so equals not at all.

While I haven’t gained all that much weight (roughly 5 pounds) my body fat has gone up a whopping 8 percent.  So, yeah, that 5 pounds is made up entirely of flubber.  My daughter drove the point home for me, by poking my booty cheek while I changed clothes in the closet a few days ago.  I didn’t think much of the poke until, a minute later, she said, “Hey.  Why is your butt still moving?”  Hmmm, maybe it’s time to act on Natasha’s tip.

So, I exercised yesterday.  I did the first 10 minutes of “Buns of Steel” – don’t laugh, I know it’s VHS and totally rocks the 90’s music, but it’s what I had on hand, OK?  I don’t have time to go to the dang gym. 

The video is actually 30 minutes long but I figured I’d better stop early, since my legs felt so wobbly they wouldn’t support my upper half.  Then I moved on to “10 minute abs” by Crunch Fitness. 

The truth is, I DID feel awesome after I exercised.  I was so proud of myself and imagined I could feel a difference in my belly already.  Don’t even ask how my legs and abs feel today, though.  The uncharacteristic sweat pants I’m wearing might give you a clue.  That and the fact that I can’t even bend down to pick up the mint M&M I dropped on the floor.

The verdict?  I know exercise is good for me, but being sore sucks.  I think I’ll take up walking or riding the stationary bike for a while until I’m not such a wimp.

Ease of use:  Well, I had to find time to exercise when my kids weren’t around.  So, while Alison was at school and Blythe napped, I busted a move.  The exercises themselves were easy enough at the time.

Minute count: 20 minutes of exercise, 15 minutes of showering and getting re-dressed.

Dollar count: $0, since I dusted off my VHS tapes.

Over all rating: Still waiting to feel sexy, but I know my ass didn’t grow to this size over night.  I’m willing to be in it for the long haul.  Ask my ass how sexy it feels in a few months.  Or, hopefully, a couple of weeks!

* My husband took a picture of my almost-nude butt for me, but GAH, I’m not sure I can post it.  Maybe after I have a few drinks it’ll miraculously show up. *

Guest Post: Rock the Lingerie

November 3, 2008

Shana over at So Not Zen was brave kind enough to be our first guest poster!  She took her husband’s wallet on a mission to bring her sexy back… go Shana!

PREFACE: OK.  To put this into some context… I adore my husband of 10+ years, but we’ve been in a, shall we say, slump. Or at least I’ve been in a slump. It’s never been him; it’s me, since I stopped taking hormone replacement a couple of years ago. I had a complete hysterectomy a few years back and was just fine on hormone replacement, but when I stopped that, BAM!, everything related to libido was just gone. And in the blink of an eye, I went from sexy momma to ice queen.

THE STORY: A couple of weekends ago, my Hubby went fishing. This is not a rare occurrence in our family. He left Sunday and came home Monday afternoon. He walks in the door and says, “I had a dream about you last night. You were wearing red panties.”

I am unloading the dishwasher and say, “Ha ha, that’s funny. I don’t own a pair of red panties.”

So he takes his wallet out of his pocket, tosses it to me, and he’s all, like, “Why don’t you go shopping?”

I’m embarrassed to admit that this little brief exchange kind of got me going. And it was kind of like a dare, which I NEVER have been able to back down from a dare (much to my parents’ horror when I was a teen, but that’s a post for another day). So I’m all, like, “OK”, grab the wallet and head out the door, calling over my shoulder, “There’s sausage in the fridge that needs to be cooked for the spaghetti,” and I was out of there.

Besides a sexual slump, we’ve also been in a financial slump. Not so much a slump, but a budgetary crack down on trying to save more, spend less and stop buying crap that we don’t need, which we are both guilty of. So the idea of going shopping was pretty exciting as well.

But because I am the mom and kind of a frump, instead of going to the mall, I decide I’m going to go to Target so I can buy panties… and cat food and laundry soap and a lunchable for my daughter to take to school, etc., which TOTALLY took the fun out of the whole panty shopping adventure. I am my own worst buzz kill.

So I go to Target and buy groceries and hit the “lingerie” section, such as it is at Target, and NOTHING. Not one single pair of red or even reddish panties in the store. (BUT they had some really cute new sports bras.  So I grabbed two of those. Yay!)

I couldn’t go home empty-handed, so I went over to Kohl’s, which is across the parking lot from Target, and bought a pair of red panties and, as a little bonus, a red bra.

I get home and hubby is in the kitchen cooking the spaghetti sauce with sausage, and I come in not with a dainty little pink lingerie bag but with, like, five big target bags and a sack of cat food. And he’s, like, WTF?

And I’m like, “Don’t worry, we’re cool,” and he’s trying to see what’s in the bags… and it was kind of fun again.

THE OUTCOME: I’ll spare you all the details, but I will say the dare was a success and the lingerie was well received. May you all be motivated to spice things up today, even if you’ve become more Target and less Victoria’s Secret at this stage of your marriage : )

Daily Make-up

October 29, 2008

Today’s Tip:  Wear a little bit of make-up, even if you’re not going anywhere.  What you see in the mirror can change your mood and confidence level.

Despite wearing enough make-up in my teens to rival a hooker in the red light district, I have significantly toned down my facial routine in more recent years, in favor of a more natural look.  In fact, most days I don’t wear any make-up at all, since I’m not going much of anywhere. 

However, Natasha says that wearing your two favorite make-up items every day is a must for feeling and looking sexy.  Her two staples are mascara and lip gloss – but I decided to focus just on my eyes this time around.  I conducted a little experiment to see the effects of a little eye liner and mascara.

First I put eye liner and mascara on just one of my eyes.  Then I took a picture, cropped it in half, and looked at each side of my face separately.  You remember this experiment from 7th grade science class, don’t you?  You’re supposed to guess things about the person like age, profession, mood, and at the end you’re stunned because the two people who seemed so completely different are actually the same person. 

right side

right side

What jumps out at me are the circles under my eyes and forehead wrinkles.  I look tired and homely.  And my nostril looks freaking enormous. 
left side

left side

Personally, I think I look younger and more attractive in this photo.  I don’t notice the under-eye circles nearly as much (in fact, I had to purposefully look for them) and even though it’s the same photo as the one above, I think I look happier. 


Looking at it all put together, I think the eye with the make-up looks bigger, too.  Freaky, isn’t it?  And of course, just to prove that my face isn’t actually that asymmetrical, here’s the photo with both eyes done. 

Ahhh, much better.  The under eye circles and forehead wrinkles are still there, but I don’t notice them as much.

The verdict?  I’m totally convinced – I’ll be putting on a little make-up every day.

Ease of use:  Super duper easy – almost impossible to screw up.

Minute count: 2 minutes, although if I want to get all fancy with the eye liner, it can take 5.

Dollar count: Mascara $5 CoverGirl,   Eye-liner $3 some random brand.

Over all rating:  A great tip: simple, easy and effective.  The photos speak for themselves!  And it’s true, seeing a prettier me in the mirror DID boost my confidence AND improve my mood.  Go figure!

The Push-up Bra

October 27, 2008

Today’s Tip:  Try a push-up bra for extra perkiness and a more defined shape.

When Natasha suggested I try a push-up bra while we were on a recent trip with our fellas, I was intrigued by the idea, but at the same time a little skeptical, for a few reasons.

For one, I’ve got a pretty nice rack already (says me, and that’s who counts here).  For two, it’s only been three months since I stopped breast feeding our youngest daughter.  After 14 months of my boobs entering a room before me, it’s been kind of nice, having them back in my own zip code. 

For three, I don’t want to attract unwanted attention.  Having to slap some guy for staring at my cleavage isn’t exactly my idea of a good time.  Well, unless it’s my husband, of course, and then it might be fun.

Natasha recommended the Victoria’s SecretWater Bra“, which surprisingly didn’t bring back memories of the socks I stuffed in my training bra at all.  It’s not bulky with padding, and actually formed around the natural shape of my breasts, adding exactly what Natasha said it would:  perkiness and a nice curve to the shape of my body. 

Don't worry, that's not me.

Don't worry, that's not me.

The verdict?  Pretty hot stuff.  

I won’t be wearing a push-up bra in my daily life, but on date nights with my husband, or times when I’d like to add a little extra oomph to my shape, this is a definite go-to tip.

Ease of use:  Very easy

Minute count: less than one, even for this push-up rookie

Dollar count: $42 for the one I wore, although Vickie’s has tons of options around $32

Over all rating: I felt very sexy in the Victoria’s Secret Water Bra, but not sexy to the point of skeeviness.  My husband complimented me several times, not just on my cleavage, but on how nice I looked in general.  An added bonus?  Improved posture.

An Introduction

October 27, 2008
The whole point of  this blog, “Sexy Makes a Comeback” is for me (Andrea) to get a little bit of my groove back after two kids, lack of sleep and life in general have given me wrinkles, gray hair and a squishier body.  We’re here trying to prove that “sexy” isn’t as hard as it looks, no matter of your age or shape.  After all, sexy is as sexy does.

Natasha, my hot friend, is going to come up with tips for me to try.  Then I’ll give you the lowdown on how the new move made me feel, how easy/hard it was to carry out, and where possible, give a minute and dollar count on each tip as well as before and after photos.  Maybe, as this not-entirely-young grasshoppa gets into the swing of things, I’ll even come up with a few tips of my own.

Being sexy is about more than looking attractive for other people – it’s about confidence.  When you feel good about yourself and the way you look, you walk with your head held high and are more likely to take the world by storm.  At heart, each and every one of us is a Phenomenal Woman.

Got a tip for me to try?  Questions?  Comments?  Suggestions?  Interested in writing a guest post?    Email us at sexycomeback(at)gmail(dot)com.

We love feedback!  Comments are the currency of the blogosphere, so toss us your spare change.

Thanks for reading!


About the authors:

Andrea is a 31 year old work at home mother of two daughters, Alison (5) and Blythe (1).  She is happily married to Jeremy, her husband of 6 years.  Their family lives on a small ranch in Northern California, where they also have a plumbing business.  To read about their daily lives, hop on over to Sweet Life, where Andrea tells all kinds of tales.

Natasha, the resident hot chick, is 23 and also lives in Northern California with her fiance, Rick, and their Yorkie, Niki.  She enjoys snow-mobiling, shopping, and cooking up some tasty BBQ.  Natasha is a former dancer (but not THAT kind of dancer, you perv) and competitive gymnast who loves to laugh.

Natasha & Dre

Natasha & Dre